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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23056123">Ghost</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>TentenWeek2020 [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Gen, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, This hurts me, i changed something but not too much, neji and tenten relationship is mentioned but i tried to focus on tenten more, so yeah neji dies in this one, tentenweek2020</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 12:01:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,385</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23056123</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He must have felt so alone without her. If she weren’t so sad, Tenten would laugh at herself. Sad? Alone? Neji is dead.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hyuuga Neji/Tenten, Rock Lee &amp; Tenten</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>TentenWeek2020 [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1653217</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Ghost</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So yeah I didn't ignore canon and wrote about Neji's death. I don't know what to think about this tbh, I feel like every thing I write is not good enough. That being said, I really hope you will like it (I suffered writing about Neji's death, to be honest)</p><p>As always kudos are really appreciated, and if you want let me know what you think.</p><p>(Remember kids: Neji is alive and happy, canon doesn't exist).</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> “If you must mourn, my love </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Mourn with the moon and the stars up above </em>
</p><p>
  <em> If you must mourn, don’t do it alone </em>
</p><p>
  <em> (Keaton Henson - You) </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>*</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>She was his freedom, and apparently death was his freedom too. It took her a long time to accept it, but in the end she did. </p><p> </p><p>He wasn't the only ghost of her past. Her mistakes were there too, the many times she did something wrong during a mission, especially after losing him. </p><p> </p><p>Lee, bless his soul, never blamed her for anything. But she was guilty. A child almost died during a fight against a missing-nin, because she didn't attack when she was supposed to-- because she thought that he would be there to finish her attacks, but he wasn’t there anymore. <b>Dead. He’s dead, </b>she kept thinking to herself. He will never be there to finish her attacks anymore, and he will never smile at her again. He’s just gone.</p><p> </p><p>She took a break after that. No more mission, no more being a Kunoichi, no nothing. It was too risky for herself and for other people, she didn’t have the focus she used to have, so taking a break was the best thing she could do for herself. Tenten knew that she needed to focus on herself first, so she did. She took care of the traumatizing events that she had to endure during the war. Facing them instead of escaping from them as far as she could, as long as she could. </p><p> </p><p>Tenten feels good, not always, but most of her days are ‘good days’. She recently opened a weapon shop, and she is happier now that she was years ago. The years after the war were the worst moments in her life. Years filled with ghosts, regrets, pain and a sense that her life would never be the same. </p><p> </p><p>"So Tenten, are you gonna visit him today?", Lee asks gazing at her.</p><p> </p><p>"I… don't know." </p><p> </p><p>"After the funeral, you never visited him again," he says "I guess it’s too hard for you, uh? I could come with you, if you want." </p><p> </p><p>"I blamed Hinata for his death. I'm not worthy of visiting him, and I never will be." </p><p> </p><p>"Please, Tenten don't say that," he begs, "You cannot blame yourself for this, you were suffering, the man you loved died that day. You blamed her, Naruto, Obito and yourself too. Isn't time to forgive yourself, huh?" </p><p> </p><p>"You keep saying the man I loved, but the thing is that I still love him.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know,” he says, laying a hand on my shoulder “But sooner or later you have to face him, and you cannot keep avoiding his grave any longer. You need to visit him, you need to.”</p><p> </p><p>She closes her eyes and nods “Yeah, you’re right.”</p><p> </p><p>"You no longer blame Hinata, you were suffering and you needed to blame someone, and I honestly think that you need to forgive yourself."</p><p> </p><p>"No, it's not her fault... and she really helped me, after I confessed that I blamed her," she confesses "I guess you're right, I guess I need to forgive myself too."</p><p> </p><p>Hinata has never been mad at her, ever. That girl is really an angel, after confessing that she had blamed her, she had embrace her and held her tight, whispering that she understood her and that she too missed Neji very much. Tenten and Hinata formed an even stronger bond after Tenten had finally let go of her anger.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll leave you alone,” he says “I can see that you need to be alone, call me if you need me.”</p><p><br/>“Sure,” she says and hugs him, he’s warm and alive, the opposite of how she thinks of herself, because she thinks that she is cold. Her entire body is cold, perhaps Lee is right, she needs to visit him, and she needs to close this chapter of her life. It’s been almost five years, she needs to go on and not live in the past. She promised to Neji that she would go on in life.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em> “Just promise me something, will you?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “What?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Just promise me that you will never give up, okay?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “When?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “War is harsh, and we might end up dying,” he whispers to her “If I’m gonna die, please live, don’t let my death be your downfall.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You won’t die, Neji,” she says worried “Don’t be silly, you won’t die.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “It might happen,” he replies “I’m just being realistic, not pessimistic.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “But--” </em>
</p><p><em><br/></em> <em> “Just know that I love you, Ten,” says his voice full of sentiment, almost as if he wanted to pour his love into Tenten’s heart “I love you so much, and nothing will ever change that.” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You are not dead, Neji,” she says desperately, “You are not dead, and you are not gonna die, please…” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He hugs her, holding close to his chest, “Everything could happen, this is war and not a simple mission, I just don’t want anything be left unsaid and I don’t want you to doubt my love.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I don’t doubt your love,” she says “But you are scaring me.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Take my ring, and I will take yours, and if one of us dies, the other will hold both rings. In a way or another we will always be together.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Tenten starts crying, it sounds so much like a goodbye. She knows that he would give his life for Hinata (out of love, not out of duty) and she’s scared. What if he sacrifices himself for her? How could she go on, knowing that he willingly left her? How could she go on, watching everyone having their happy ending, while hers will not be happy at all? She doesn’t want to lose him, just the thought is enough to make her crumble. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you,” he whispers again “Never forget that I love you.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you too.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She promised, it was easy. She never thought that he would die, she was convinced that she would die, not him, never him. She blamed Hinata and Naruto for his death, so after his funeral she felt not worthy of visiting him.</p><p> </p><p>Unworthy of his love. Her pain made her numb for months, perhaps years.</p><p> </p><p>His ring is around her neck, it was too big for her finger, so using a chain was the best thing. She was sure that she would never lose it and that she could always carry the ring with her. Her ring was on her right ring finger, wearing it on her left one would have attracted attention and questions. The stone in the center, discreet, is the moonstone. The color of the stone always reminded her of Neji’s eyes, when they had promised that they would get married, sooner or later, that had been the ring that Neji gave her. Knowing her to well, he knew that this was her favorite stone.</p><p> </p><p>Their marriage was never meant to be, but she no longer felt the raw pain she felt during those months after the war.</p><p> </p><p>“Neji,” she whispers “I miss you so much.”</p><p> </p><p>Tenten thinks she’s ready to visit him. She’s ready now. Suddenly she feels a hand on her shoulder, she turns around but there’s no one with her. She brushes off the sensation, and she puts her sandals, ready to go out.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>When she reaches the cemetery she breathes deeply. The pain seems to suffocate her, taking her breath away, clenching her hands into fists she enters the cemetery. Walking slowly, without any hurry, remembering the last moments of Neji’s life.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em> “Tenten,” he whispers “Where’s Tenten?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Tenten-chan?”, Hinata asks “Oh, she’s here, she’s here.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Tenten runs in a hurry to avoid losing the last moments of Neji’s life. When she arrives next to him, she puts a hand on his shoulder, she moves him gently, and she rests Neji’s head on her shoulder. Rock Lee approaches them, placing a hand on Neji’s chest.  Tenten can hear Neji’s shaky breath and the chills that are going through Lee’s body. Kakashi-sensei has loaded Gai-sensei on his back to help him reach his students. They started this together, and will stay with him until the very end. </em>
</p><p><em><br/></em> <em> “Neji,” Tenten whispers with tears in her eyes “Nej.” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Ten,” his voice is weak “You are here.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Tenten sees Neji try to raise his hand, so he can rest it on her face (for the last time), but he doesn’t have the strength to do it and Tenten doesn’t have the strength to look away from him. Lee takes Neji’s hand between his, the contrast between his complexion and Neji’s one makes Tenten shiver. Neji is so pale. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> She understands that Lee wants to help Neji and when he places his hand on her face, Lee keeps holding Neji’s hand knowing that the latter is too weak. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Take your ring,Ten,” he says with difficulty, his lips are smeared with his own blood. There is no trace of the boy she promised she would fight even if he died. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Rock Lee pulls the chain around Neji’s neck and squeezes the ring in his hand, before putting it in the pocket of her jacket. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Lee,” his voice is now becoming a whisper. </em>
</p><p><em><br/></em> <em> “Yes, my eternal rival?” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I would have liked to fight you,” he says with a faint and weak smile. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Gai-sensei watches their students. His heart bleeds thinking about what their life will be like next. Tenten’s life will change forever, Rock Lee will probably try to face everything with a smile, but inside he will be destroyed by pain. And Gai-sensei… well he has the impression of having betrayed his students. Sensei should sacrifice themselves for their students and friends, not the other way around. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Thank you, Gai-sensei,” Neji whispers weakly. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Gai-sensei smiles, whispering that his youthful energy will always be the strongest. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Finally, he focuses on Tenten. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you,” Neji whispers weakly. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you too.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> She lean towards him and kisses him gently, she feels the taste of blood on her lips, but does not move. This will be their last kiss, and she doesn’t want to waste time. When they finally separate, she realizes that Neji looks so tired. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you so much.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Neji breathes deeply for one last time before closing his eyes forever. The cursed mark slowly disappears from his forehead, sealing his Byakugan, sealing his fate. Neji’s hand slips, his fingers stroking her cheek  for the last time. Lee is crying leaning against Neji’s shoulder. Warm tears flow down her face, giving him one last kiss, before hugging him and placing a hand on his chest. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Silence. A part of her heart stopped beating with his. </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>When she is in front of Neji’s tombstone she must hold back tears. She never came here after the funeral, and she feels so guilty. He must have felt so alone without her. If she weren’t so sad, Tenten would laugh at herself. Sad? Alone? Neji is dead, he no longer hears anything, he no longer sees or feels anything.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry if it took me so long,” she whispers “Only that I felt so guilty. I’ve been so mad at Hinata for so long that I don't deserve to come and see you.”</p><p> </p><p>Obviously there is no answer, but Tenten is fine with that. Neji’s ring seems to burn her skin, but she is aware that it is only a sensation.</p><p> </p><p>She still feels a hand on her shoulder, but there is no one next to her. Once again, she doesn’t care much about what happened. Her brain playing tricks on her and making her believe there is someone next to her (maybe even <em> him </em>).</p><p>She doesn’t stay for long, she walks home after ten minutes, when she finally closes the door behind her, she breathes deeply and lies down on the sofa. She caresses the ring that should have been her wedding ring. Her shop is fine, sometimes she struggles, but she doesn’t complain. Everything is fine, she has not let herself go, and she has not isolated herself. But she misses Neji, she misses his warmth, his voice… she misses everything about him. She closes her eyes, hoping to see him at least in her dreams.</p><p> </p><p>When she opens her eyes she realizes she is still in the cemetery. She looks around confused when suddenly someone puts his hand on her shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi.”</p><p> </p><p>“Neji?”, she whispers “Neji,” she repeats, embracing him.</p><p> </p><p>She can touch him, embrace him, feel his warmth, she notices that his forehead is covered, but she doesn’t care. She hugs him tightly, crying all the tears she thought she had already shed.</p><p> </p><p>“I miss you so much.”</p><p> </p><p>“I miss you too,” he whispers, hugging me “so much.”</p><p> </p><p>His voice is strong and clear. Light years away from the thread of voice with which he spoke before he died.</p><p> </p><p>“But I’m always with you,” he says “Every day, every hour, and every moment. I’m close to you even when you think you’re alone.”</p><p> </p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m in your heart.”</p><p><br/>“You’re so romantic,” she replies as she continues to hug him</p><p> </p><p>Maybe all of this is a dream, or it’s a reality, but she doesn't care. She wanted for so long to feel his warmth. It’s nice to feel the beat of his heart, strong and unwavering, she closes her eyes with a smile.</p><p> </p><p>“And I will always be with you,” he declares “And I love you still”</p><p> </p><p>“I love you too.”</p><p> </p><p>She doesn’t let Neji go for what seems hours and then everything becomes dark, and she wakes up on her sofa, in her home. No trace of Neji, but something inside her has changed. The loneliness she has always felt, while trying to hide the fact that she felt so alone, seems to have disappeared. </p><p> </p><p>Without knowing why Tenten is aware that she can go on, aware that there will be worse days and better days, but now she feels strong enough. She can finally go on and she no longer feels numb. Going to the cemetery served to soothe and heal the biggest wound in her heart.</p><p><br/>“Thank you, Nej,” she whispers.</p><p> </p><p>A hand rests on her shoulder, and this time she knows it’s Neji. She cannot see him, but she knows he’s beside her.</p><p><br/>“I’m here, always,” Neji whispers in her ear. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm trying my best to not make mistakes (English is not my first language) but if you see some mistakes please let me know!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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